Do happy couples really exist?, a friend asked me yesterday.
What do you think?
Hmm….I don’t know.
My answer was – most of the couples are happy sometimes in their marriage and unhappy at other times.
If we are aware of our beliefs, attitude, perceptions & habits when we are in happy phase. And we consciously focus on that and live an aware life; there will be more happy couples than unhappy ones.
Have you ever thought what are the common habit traits of Happy Couples?
Here are seven of them.
1. They take responsibility for their Happiness
Happy couples = Happy Individuals
Happy individuals make happy couples. Simple.
Happy people know that their happiness is their own responsibility and not their partner’s or someone else.
A person who blames, complains and tries to change their partner for their own happiness, is not a happy person at all.
While a person who is in total acceptance of life….of themselves….and their life partner, is the happiest person and create happy relationships. Period.
2. Relationship is on their priority list
They understand their commitment to the most intimate relationship means – ‘commitment to self’. They keep it on their top priority and make sure to devote significant time and care to nurture that.
A relationship is like a tree, once you plant a seed and you forget to nurture it with regular care, how will it blossom?
3. They agree to disagree
No two individuals can have same thinking, habits and choices in life; especially when they are from different sex, different families and had different upbringing.
Happy couples learn to understand and appreciate their differences. They agree to disagree on matters and respect other’s opinion by true listening. And harmony is natural for them.
They laugh together (not at each other).
4. Appreciate each other more than they criticise
Happy couples are smart enough to understand nagging and belittling doesn’t work with adults (even with kids, for that matter), hence they refrain from it as much as possible.
They have more positive interactions than the negative ones. They like to acknowledge little things their partners do for them …rather than criticising what they don’t do.
A happy ratio of positive to negative interactions is 8:1 and they tend to follow it naturally.
5. They go to Bed at the Same Time
In this fast moving…too distracting world, the only time we stop and take pause is – when we go to bed.
They drop the temptations to take work to bed or answer chats on social media or mails and rather devote this time to themselves and their partner.
They make the most of this time and connect deeply and intimately and share their love with their partner.
6.They rock it by letting go
The ability to let go and stay in a state of gratitude is the one of the highest quality and best habit of a happy individual.
Happy couples notice and focus upon the qualities of others and situations that they can be grateful for.
They consciously let go of any grudges or resentments they have, because they know that these negative memories only drain their energy & power to give generously and be a loving person.
7. They consciously grow their relationship
Last but not the least, Happy couples understand that growing their relationship with anyone means growing themselves.
They grow themselves into most loving, joyful, compassionate and empathic person they know.
Why?
Because that’s the purpose of being in a relationship, anyway – TO GROW.
If the relationship doesn’t help you evolve into the person you truly are, then the whole purpose of being in a relationship is defied.
How many of these habits do you have? What are the habit traits that define your relationship?
And even a better question, which habits would you like to develop to become a happy partner?
What other habits you see in happy couples? Share with me in comments below, I would love to add them here.
Much love.